Balance vs Imbalance in conversations

You either experience balance or imbalance, a healthy distance and closeness or an obsession in closeness. A respect of boundaries, or constantly pushing boundaries.

Expressions of balance in any relationship, whether it be with family members, friends, or significant others is the realization of abundance within both people. You both have a mutual respect when you are together and mutual respect when you’re apart. When someone is opening up to you, you listen attentively keeping the attention and focus of your responses on the person. When someone is talking about something in their life, you don’t somehow try to talk about your life. You listen to them fully, ask questions, and you’re fully engaged in what they have to say out of respect that they are speaking and they are hoping you are listening. Then the same is granted back to you when they are done with the conversation. You don’t force the “baton of attention” by taking it from them, you allow them to hand it off to you when they are ready by them starting to ask you questions. 

Imbalance and obsession in relationships is when you come from a place of lack and need. You feel like your relationships aren’t fulfilled. You feel like you have to constantly reach out to people and they never first reach out to you. You feel a constant lack in some sort of way whether it’s in family, friends, or significant other relationships which keeps you talking about it over and over again in an obsessive way. Lack creates obsession just as hunger creates famine. You desire the ability to talk more about your problems than the desire to retain the balance in the blessed relationship. By doing this, you drain others because they expect nothing less than you to control the floor with your obsessions sourced in lack rather than focus on retaining the balance sourced in abundance.