Entry 34 - Lesson on Identity

PSA: I want to reiterate these lessons are lessons I've learned in the past, and now I bring to light for those in the present. If it doesn't help you, that's fine, but if it helps, I'm glad.

For those of us who follow a certain type of faith, there are a set of challenges that arise from entering a particular religious community, of which we all must be aware of so that we do not adopt this type of thinking. With anything, there will always be challenges, but protecting ourselves from negative thinking can help others and ourselves.

One is this mentality everything we need is in this religious community and if we're not in it, we are not getting all that we need and will suffer in our religious walk. This is a very dangerous mindset to have because it takes all that we need in God and instead prescribes it to a community. Then subliminally, your worth, your faith, your beliefs, are all tied to this particular religious community and if you are not part of it, you wrongly feel not part of God. Then sort of like a mirage, if you're not dedicated and devoted to your church, you feel guilty and far away from God. You tie your dedication and commitment to a group of people to your relationship with God.

If you're completely devoted to one community where you accept all that they pour into you with no resistance and make it completely connected to your faith in God to where if you lack time in your community, you lack substance with your relationship with God, you will hurt yourself. That way of thinking will render you feeling guilty and even more dependent on the community than before, and soon it will be hard to separate your identity from that community that holds a piece of your identity within it.  Your oneness will be tied to that religious community rather than just solely on God.

Don't get me wrong, I believe it's incredibly beneficial to be a part of a community that shares and values what you value, but I also believe it's important that you retain your individuality at the same time so that you do not fall into the trap of blindly following the leaders and doctrines and become a mouthpiece only for that religious community in addition to God.

Part of being human is wanting to be one in purpose to accomplish more, and that's great. Jesus prayed that we would all be aware that we all are one already, but the problem is so many people attribute that oneness to a set of external doctrinal beliefs, a certain way of doing things, and that picky oneness actually divides us from others. I consider that type of oneness that has its foundations on a community, particular beliefs, doctrines or even on set ways of doing things as religious oneness.

If your religious community has a set of beliefs and then puts down other religious community's beliefs that differ from theirs, then it's not much different than a religious community built on division. One can exist, thrive, and be a positive community in the world without having to create a divide that causes division in the world. The struggle is real though, and it's easy to fall into the trap of devotion to a community over devotion to God.

A religious group might even tie in your service, your time spent there, your loyalty to God to you serving at that church, and again I say that's a dangerous mindset to have because say you're sick, or say you have other commitments, and you can't make it to your church. Then you begin to feel guilty because you haven't been devoted to your community for God. That way of thinking is dangerous because it's linking your relationship with God to a very specific community. You can thrive and not be 100% involved and wrapped up in one single community.

Personally, I believe it's much healthier to branch out and be a part of many communities. The reason why is I believe it helps you be aware of your individuality. When you see maybe a few people who don't think exactly like you, you're not pressured to switch your mindset to conform because you're aware that doctrines don't define us, they're part of religious communities and religious communities naturally are different, but you can focus on things that really matter, the oneness in God that we all have whether we believe it or not. 

When I see a Buddhist, I could instantly think of all the things that divide us and keep that division at the forefront of my mind, but who will that help? How will that help? However, if I focus on what brings us together rather than what I don't agree with, that mentality can strengthen within us the realization that we all are one. If you learn about different communities, you can actually realize there's a lot more that we share than what we differ on. Goodness is not tied to a certain religious community, it's tied to God. All other positive traits are also tied to God, so you must remember that all humans can experience God and display these traits of positivity, even if their walk of life doesn't look exactly like yours.

Lastly, the mentality that your religious community is better than many if not all other religious communities is also a harmful and negative way of thinking that will hinder your interaction with others and your outlook on them as well. If you see your religious community as advanced, or with the best doctrine, etc., that leaves you with an attitude of superiority over others that might not exactly practice the same exact way as you do. This leads to a mentality of judgment that will lodge itself in the front of your mind and reinforce your focus onto that which differs rather than what unites. Then, when you see someone, you can't help but attach your judgment to how they're different from you, and it's harder for you to love because you're instead too busy judging them. Jesus told us not to judge, or we too would be judged. So why is it so normal for us to pull out the judgment card rather than the love card? Hopefully we can all strive together to be connected and love another, rather than to focus on what divides and to judge.

So in the end, don't tie your identity strictly to your religious community but rather, tie it solely to God. It's great to have a community, but don't allow that community to fully determine who you are to a point where you lose who you are to become what your religious community is. Appreciate your individuality. Appreciate how God made you. Appreciate you and also appreciate them. See beyond the doctrines, beliefs, and values of other religious communities and rather focus on the oneness that is there regardless of what might seem different on the surface. Lastly, if you're in a religious community, protect yourself from seeing your community as the most superior one over all other ones. Try desperately to keep a humble heart and a learning heart where you are always open to learning from everyone.