Entry 72 - Lesson on Attachments

8/27/19

Many people have hobbies, activities, food and so on that they enjoy and that is definitely okay. However, when any of those things become an obsession, there is a potential threat for someone to create attachment to that object. For example, watching TV isn't bad. There are a lot of lessons we can learn from the stories told on television. However, when we start to believe we need to watch TV in order to be happy, then that perception leads to a dependency which elicits a response where then one spends hours and hours consumed by episodes after episodes, and then before one knows it, six hours have been spent in bed binge-watching that show. Paul in the Bible said, "Everything is permissible, but not all things are edifying." Watching TV is not bad, eating is not bad, drinking is not bad, but in excess it can lead to a dependency that creates attachment.

The problem with finding happiness in that which is outside of us is that the happiness in an object or an activity only can give us a temporary feeling of pleasure and happiness.  They cannot provide a sustaining happiness because they are not sustaining within themselves. Also over time, we might realize we require more from these activities or objects to sustain that happiness we expect it to bring us, but the happiness it brings still remains temporary. Attachment isn't necessarily dependent on excessive intake of that object or participation in that activity. Instead, I would say it's more of the state of mind that person has in regard to whatever it is because that state of mind governs the action one will take. 

For example, drinking alcohol in itself is not bad, but maybe one night you feel like you just can't turn off your thoughts, and you need to escape reality, and you believe that if you're drunk, it'll help you loosen up and be happy. Maybe it's fun in the moment, but in the morning, you realize you woke up with a nasty hangover and forgot most of the conversations you had last night. Or maybe someone feels like they need alcohol because they want to be goofy and blame it on "drunk me" because they're too afraid to be goofy and weird in real life. Or maybe they excessively drink alcohol because they want to blame something for their bad actions that deep down they really want to commit but don't want to be held completely accountable for, so they excessively drink to release themselves from those careless acts they will commit. I'd say those ways of thinking are very well rooted in dependency and attachment.

The danger of using objects outside of us to make us happy is like putting on a wet bandage on an open wound that doesn't stop the blood. The person tries to patch up a wound in the soul with a temporary object only to find out it's not really working that well, but they don't know what else to do, so they just return to it each week. They believe the lie from the ego that sustained happiness doesn't actually exist, and our only option is dependency on these objects or activities to receive any inkling of happiness. So week after week, they return to it for that temporary bandage when they should be going to the good Doctor and properly dealing with that wound.

So where does that leave us? First of all, why do we seek happiness that which is without? Because we've convinced ourselves that is the only place we can find it. We allow our mind to fool us into thinking that we are not happy and then tricks us by keeping our thoughts on the past and the future, rather than in the present. We're so unconscious that we identify with the past and present and believe that we aren't happy, and before we know it we're longing for something else, someone else, some object, some activity to bring that happiness back that we believe we lack.

However, the truth is, within every human being there lies an eternal source of happiness, they just need help realizing it. To the one who maybe their whole life relied on something outside of them to experience happiness, that might seem too easy to be true. Some people might think that's impossible. Me? Do they know my life? Do they know my circumstances? 

However, only by your initiative to be aware of that truth could you ever possibly begin to tap into it. And if you knew you could be released and free from all attachments outside of you, why wouldn't you at least try to enter into that truth? Or maybe you genuinely have never really thought that happiness can be found from within you. Well, if you're always seeking things outside of you to give you happiness, then of course you won't have time to try to discover that happiness within you.

There is a direct and evident connection between awareness, consciousness, and true happiness. The connection is that they are all eternal, they all go past forms, they have no end and their source is God. Everyone on this Earth has access to this oneness, however not everyone knows they do nor do they know the ways to become aware of it. This isn't about achieving some type of state that is outside of you, it's about realizing your actual state that is already within you. Some Christian's might even try to argue and say that God is only in some and not in all, but I would ask where does it say that, because I can tell you where it says that God is over all, through all, in all (Ephesians 4:6).  

In religion, yes maybe the belief is that God can only be with you after saying or doing certain things, but I'd say beyond religion, God is and always will be and there is no where He cannot be, nor no one He cannot be with. How freakin' awesome is that? And would we really try to limit God and say He can't be somewhere when in His essence He is the beginning and the end, the Alpha and Omega, the Great I Am, omnipotent, omnipresent, and is the Creator of our whole entire universe? I'm just going to pass on limiting God and say yes, He is with you.

One of  my favorite ways to experience this lasting happiness is through meditation. I use Insight Timer, a free app that has a lot of options, but you could also use Spotify or YouTube. Try to set apart time each day to meditate and to become more mindful of the present. You may only be able to do 5 minutes a day before your mind goes down a bunny hill, but 5 minutes is better than no minutes. I remember struggling with 10 minutes a day, and now 20 minutes a day is surprisingly a breeze. The more you practice mindfulness and awareness, the more you'll realize everything that I'm writing is what you already knew. Everything that I'm saying is already your truth. You've always had the ability to be free from attachment, but now you're making it into a reality, if you choose to.

I cannot explain how liberating it is to be happy with simply being. How liberating it is to not need food, drugs, TV shows, video games, alcohol or other indulgences to be happy, but to know that all you need can be found within. Once you've entered into this true happiness, none of the other temporary sources of happiness compares. I've had so many people ask me over and over, but how, and again I point them back to but how not? When you know this, how could I ever go back to that which never fully satisfied me in the first place? So I leave you with this ending note: Feel free to know that you can be free, but it starts with you. No one else will make that choice for you. I've tried to help people who are hurting so much that the negativity from them can be felt and if not careful, can be draining, but at the end of the day, they were left with the decision on their own to change their lives or remain in their current condition. If you choose to make that decision, watch as what you thought maybe could never happen, becomes your peaceful reality.