Entry 714 - To Whom it May Concern

Let me make this very clear to those who think I’m transitioning because they believe it’s a man’s world and I’m jealous (real quick, lmao). I’m not transitioning out of envy for men or disdain for womanhood. I’m transitioning so that my body aligns with my brain because, in my brain, I have always felt that I am a man.

To those who hold this misconception, consider this: Does anyone really believe I would want to go through all this extra trouble—taking a testosterone shot each week, enduring life-changing, permanent surgeries—just out of jealousy? Do they think that since childhood, when I began expressing that I am a boy, it was simply a massive phase that would eventually end? A 25-year-long phase is quite the stretch, don’t you think?

Do they really imagine I prefer using men’s restrooms, which often have pee splattered everywhere and smell unpleasant, over women’s restrooms? Do they think I want to miss out on girl slumber parties? Do they assume I’m willing to jeopardize amazing friendships because I’m now perceived as a man, leading some to view me as a threat and preventing me from hanging out with their girlfriends? I am medically transitioning because, for me, it is the healthiest and safest course of action due to gender incongruence.

Does anyone think it’s a choice to experience constant chronic stress just from inhabiting my body? The mismatch between my body and brain has been the root of most, if not all, of my past health issues and anxiety. Why would I fabricate any of this? Why would I go out of my way to share the deepest, most vulnerable aspects of my being if it weren’t absolutely necessary? Why would I endure so much trouble if it weren’t life-saving treatment? I’m not doing this out of jealousy; I’m doing this for my health and well-being.

It would be beneficial for people to start truly listening to what someone is expressing rather than forming opinions based on ignorance. I know it’s difficult to conceptualize what it’s like to live with gender incongruence. I understand that some distrust science because they have been conditioned by religion to filter out information that doesn’t align with their beliefs. I get that it may be easier for some to believe that I’ve just been “jealous” my whole life rather than acknowledge that gender incongruence is real. But it’s far easier to accept someone for who they say they are than to fabricate judgmental and irrational reasons that contradict what they’ve shared.

Non-acceptance often stems from ignorance and perhaps religious influence, but a place of understanding is achievable with effort. It requires considering a perspective that goes beyond ignorance or outside of religious teachings, and I believe that people are capable of that if they really want to. Many may view gender incongruence as a belief system in competition with their own religion, but it’s not a belief system. It is a proven medical diagnosis supported by research—something that religion, in some cases, envies, which is why cognitive dissonance is so prevalent.

So consider the possibility that what is being shared is true. Doing so could remove a judgmental view from the mind and may even lead to greater self-acceptance. However, if some would rather remain entrenched in ignorance or adhere to religious beliefs without questioning them, that’s their choice. Whatever they choose to believe, I hope that one day they will listen to the experiences of those directly affected rather than to people who judge from a belief system whose morals have fluctuated throughout the centuries.