Journal Discourse Part 46

Oct 6th 2021

God, beyond religion, is perfect but it is proven that Christianity has become corrupt by utilizing closed doors of confession and late night Bible groups to abuse its followers. Religion needs to hold accountable the sexual abusers who are still allowed to be leaders or else Christianity will die out from its own disgusting behavior. We’re so done with sexual abuse. It needs to stop.

It angers and disgusts me that innocent children are being manipulated by bishops, priests, pastors and teachers all over the world. It makes me physically sick in my stomach that this is STILL going on.

Jesus didn’t come to create another religion, and definitely not a religion that hurts children.
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Oct 31st

I experienced anxiety and panic attacks largely due to the fundamental doctrines taught to me within Christianity that instilled fear into my heart and beliefs about gender identity. I was then prescribed anxiety medication before I finally came out to my doctors as Transgender. I believe I had a side effect from the anti anxiety meds because right after, I had suicidal thoughts, so I stopped taking them.

I turned to meditation and after a week of meditating for ten minutes a day, it felt like my brain was rearranging itself. From that moment on, I haven’t had one single panic attack or the desire to end myself (about 3 years ago) and I rarely have anxiety. This is also largely due to accepting myself as trans rather than trying to fight it.

There's a great axiom that says, "What you resist persists."

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Once I started to break the chain of dependency, I started to realize how ingrained it used to be a part of my life in every single way. Awareness was key in breaking the habit of unnecessary dependency.

For me, I saw the intersection of conditioning people to be dependent within Fundamental Christianity, and so that is where I personally believe most of the dependency issues come from, and another huge reason why I needed to break free from religion to establish a healthy individual and independent way of interacting with the world which doesn’t default into co-dependency.
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December 26th

When I meditated, I thought about how if people were to travel at the speed of light, they would experience time at a slower rate and how people on Earth would probably either look still or very slow.

Then I wondered if that can be correlated to how fast certain brains process information over others. Perhaps certain brains move slower at processing so time seems to be against them, and other brains move and process information at faster speeds, which makes time seem slower.

So perhaps staying in a meditative state, one can stay the master of time instead of a slave of it where in the past, they were constantly trying to keep up with the events around them.

Also I thought about how camera fps (frames per seconds) correlates to the intensity of the present moment and how glorious it is to each individual.

Perhaps someone who isn’t really present, because their mind is either stuck in the past or the future, is probably seeing the world similar to how a crappy phone camera would see it, with grainy pixels versus a high tech expensive camera with an incredible fps.

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December 31st

Some belief systems are more in congruent with universal scientific principles, and others are shown to be outdated and lacking in evidence.

For example, some belief systems have taken the concept of parallel universes and made the shift to a more of a dramatic experience than it actually is, but at least they are consciously aware that the multiverse most likely does exist.

Although it is oftentimes dramatized and blown out of proportion by these belief systems, at least once again, they are aware of it. Many within the spiritual community blow it out of proportion by saying, “A new earth is coming and if you’re not ready you’ll be left behind!” Which not too surprisingly, religious people have used similar fear based doctrines of being left out for centuries to get people on their bandwagon.

There's a good chance we all shift from universe to universe constantly merely through our awareness. Potentially so subtle that many times we don’t even notice it directly, but indirectly. Maybe one day one realizes that all the street signs are now blue and white rather than green and white and they feel like their world feels different.

Or maybe they feel like people just get you and they didn't before but you have no explanation as to why. Or maybe they experience a sudden onset of a lot of Mandela effects that they can recall. The list goes on and on, but I believe shifting is a part of our awareness and experience and we all do it all the time.

Some people do it more than others, but it’s just something we do. By shifting I am referring to shifting our main awareness from one parallel universe to another.
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Many Fundamental Christians get so defensive when they realize that there are religions that are healthier than their own particular flavor of Christianity and they can’t take that. They have to believe that every other religion is deceived or else the illusion starts dissolving. But eventually, they will see that it is not the religion that saves, but the one who stands beyond all religion that can do such a thing.

When they get to a point where they can see God cannot be limited by Judaism, Christianity, or their own quirky beliefs within their preferred version of their religion, that is when things start to get exciting.
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If you’re not sure if you are on the spectrum perhaps because you had religion force you to disassociate from who you are to fit into your denomination, I’m here to help. Many of you just need to spend time alone from every org, religious group and every person and go within and then soon you’ll have the answer. But if you’re too scared to go on that journey, ask me and I’ll try to give you a head start to help you out.
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January 1st 2022

Something I realized when I was doing my fifteen minute meditation today was that last year, I tried so hard to have people think like me rather than just loving and accepting them as they are, where they are. I realize that is probably why I received similar behavior, but also within other areas of my life.

Now I’m learning to let people be where they would like to be, unless they are open to hearing, growing, discussing and expanding together. Arguments are fine, but forcing someone to see like me is pushing it a little too far.

There are people who want to argue to see if someone can find a good enough argument for them to let go of a limiting belief they hold onto, and there are people who argue because they have absolutely no desire to listen to you and want to force you to see as they see.

I hope to always reflect a positive, open way of discussing to not only teach, but also to learn. To not force my view on others, but to welcome it into their peripheral as they do so with me.

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January 1st

Isn’t it ironic that we can easily say God is all in all, but then when someone says God is here in this plant Mainstream Christians oftentimes say, “But God is not in that plant.” Then you say to them, “But you literally just said you believe in the Scripture that says God is all in all?”

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January 2nd

As I was looking up at the night sky, it quite literally dawned on me the beauty of each individual star shining brightly amidst the dark background of the night. I thought to myself, “So this is what it means to shine?” During the day, we can’t see these stars shining with all their might so brightly, but when the sun reclines into its slumber, the far away lights come through to shower our night sky with a dazzling glow.

The contrast allows these stars to be seen. To be experienced. To be known. Though in the spiritual community we oft look down on the duality complex, the contrast of life, when it serves one of the most profound experiences we can afford. It helps us to know who we are. It helps us to experience ourselves in ways so fulfilling.

The Absolute is glorious, but sometimes dipping into a period of unknown, of contrast, of polarities, allows us an experience that helps us grasp the beauty of our being in ways untold by the Absolute.

Now as the tiny star, you are seen for what you are. A shining bright light, burning with vigor with all your might. Gloriously travailing the universe and finding other bright stars to journey with you onward.


Some days may be hard, other days may be easy but regardless, you learn to appreciate it because through the journey, you find how beautiful you and all the universe is.
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January 5th

I can’t speak for everyone, but I can speak for myself in this. When I didn’t know myself, when I was scared of my will, when I was scared of myself, I was very deeply involved and codependent to Christianity.

I sought everything through the religion, even at the expense of the limitlessness of God. I was enveloped in its particular doctrines, in its lifestyle, in its indirect and direct judgement and more.

And if you say, "Oh it’s not right that they judge. That’s not the gospel." I hate to break it to you, but mainstream Christianity’s gospel is bent on needing to judge people. If you don’t judge some as unsaved and others as saved, then there is no reason for Jesus to have died on the cross, according to their interpretation as to why Jesus died on the cross.

For mainstream Christianity, Jesus died to make the sinners saints. To save people from hell, which according to them, by default everyone is destined to go to. Luckily that isn’t the interpretation of all Christian denominations and most definitely not the original churches main teaching, but somehow the minority paganist view became the majority colonial view and is the most "popular" fear based doctrine of salvation (because it did not come from Judaism).

What makes something fear based? Well if you're aware that everyone on Earth is by default going to burn forever for not believing correctly, then how miserable would you feel and how much fear would you feel for those unsaved?

If you were truly empathetic, that amount of pain, that amount of suffering, of anguish, is enough to cause deep misery continuously because that means God loses a majority of his creation to sin. And to imagine that is the way the Creator of the Universe handles disobeying his commandments? A finite mistake of belief results with infinity in hellfire? It's 100% fear based.

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January 6th

Sometimes Spirit lets me see in the future and the minute I see it, it changes everything.
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There are those who believe you don’t truly have free will.
That you don’t have desires, desires have you.
That you aren’t in control, that the universe has control over you.
That you are not responsible, nor can you do anything besides what you are supposed to do.

It reminds me of one polarized view of seeing politics or sports or religion where they demonize the shadows instead of healing them with love.

However anyone who remembers that polarity but finds balance between them, they escape that one tract mind.
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How do you defeat death if you end up dying?

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There is no such thing as objective morality.

According to the Bible, it was okay for siblings to have sex with each other at the beginning of time but now it’s not. Morality is dependent to the space and time at that moment.

In the Ten Commandments it says do not kill but that is relative to who, what, when and why. The understanding of that verse is relative to all those things.

For example, in the Bible it was technically okay to kill if that person was told by God to kill them but it was not okay to kill if it wasn’t told by God. That makes it relative.

Or another commandment says you must honor your mother and father. But that might differ from mother and father of what or how you are honoring them. Each country has different specifications of honor and dishonor. Some of those specifications can go against your own personal well-being.

Such as when the Bible says that the rapist must marry the woman he raped in order to take care of her. Do you really think that woman is going to want to marry her rapist? So if she doesn't want to because she doesn't want to risk her life to physical abuse but her parents do want her to, then is it truly dishonorable to have her refuse to marry her rapist as the Bible commands? What about in today's day in age?

The father might say to his daughter that she must marry this man or else she will dishonor her family but then to another parent he gives the option but regardless of her choice it won’t dishonor her parents. Of course it's relative.
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Sometimes it’s our time to play the game, other times it’s our time to make the game.
If you follow, follow with all of your heart.
If you lead, lead with all of your heart. But most importantly, do as thou wilt, for therein lies ones free will.
Let us remember that which we temporarily forgot: The created and creator are but one.

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People who say Jesus taught the law objectively obviously didn’t read the Bible in context. Jesus constantly challenged the rigid limitations of the law.

When they accused him of not following the sabbath correctly he pointed out how that law, relative to the situation can be treated as such depending on the situation. He paralleled his experience with David’s and thus showed the flexibility and relativity of the law.

When they tried to stone a woman for sexual sin, Jesus took them beyond the rigid law to kill and pointed it back on them. He displayed that if she deserves to die for her mistakes, then they do too. He constantly displayed the law of reciprocity because they obviously weren't getting it. He showed that the law in the Bible was meant to give life, not take it away.

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January 7th

Convince me otherwise: Enneagrams are the Christian version of astrology… The “accepted” version of it.

(It’s origins are also esoteric)
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January 8th
These questions of who am I, aren’t meant for your ego to intellectualize but meant to take you beyond the ego to your infinite nature.

There’s a saying Jews shouldn’t read the Kabbalah until they are forty because so many of felt insane reading it.

I met another guy who said his mind literally broke when he tried thinking through who he was.

Your ego can't handle your infinite essence. That's always a dead end.

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What does it mean for one to honor their body? First off, what does honor even mean? It means treating your body with respect. So I would say part of respecting your body is respecting it's various cycles. When it’s tired, you try your best to find time to rest. When it’s excited and wants to move, you go on a hike or go lift weights.

When your body has the jiggles and wants to dance, you throw on some music and dance under the moonlight. When your stomach growls and would like some food, you feed it abundant and nutritious food until it’s satisfied. When your body is feeling sexual, you allow yourself to tap into your divine oneness; you tap into your innate sexual power and release that power for your whole body to benefit from it.

Not honoring your body often happens the most when we honor other people over our bodies. We honor their expectations, what is best for them at the expense of what is best for us. We honor what is healthy for them at the expense of what is healthy for us, which truly is neither healthy for both of us since we are all interconnected in some way.

Not honoring our bodies is only eating junk food and not giving your body the proper nutrients to replenish and restore itself. Not honoring your body is working 14 hours for your company sleep deprived in order to benefit your company and not yourself. Not honoring your body could be you doing what your religion wants you to at the expense of your own body’s natural cycles.

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The thing that is keeping Mainstream Christians from exploring other religions, other practices, other things is literally their fear. The fear from their religion convinces them that any word, any meaning, any belief "outside of their religion" is demonic and so they are afraid to look and investigate because merely investigating would be enough for them to be thrown into hell

And so that's why they are even too scared to be curious about it. They are unfortunately unable to make connections to other religions to better understand the oneness we all share that goes beyond arbitrary boundaries used for control and power.

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What if the sun is actually a memory bank and the reason why we can’t stare directly at the sun during the day is because we cannot download all the memory of all the integrations it holds at it's peak? What if that is because if we could, it would ruin the "dream" we all willingly play in?

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January 8th

All major religions many years ago performed animal sacrifices. In Asia, Jerusalem, Egypt, that was the common ritual that ironically they all shared. Though certain tribes went a little farther and sacrificed people, they were barbaric practices that have largely been done away with by civilized societies.

People who say Jesus was the ultimate sacrifice are speaking in terms of the Christianity built off of the Pharisees and Zealot lines of Judaism, which has become the mainstream version of Christianity in our era due to Catholicism.

However, if you were to explore the Jewish sects that did not participate in blood sacrifices but still read the Torah, still followed God and lived often as hermits away from the crowds, they would refuse to participate in slaughtering animals to appease a God who needs blood to talk to you.

These Christians that don't believe in the blood and brimstone hell narrative are now the minorities and are considered ‘mystics’ because they focus more on the relationship with God rather than on the religion made around God.
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January 11th

How do you go around believing Jesus’ words that we are all one but in the same breath, set up division between the oneness you believe in?
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Since we are so used to moralizing everything, thanks largely to religion, maybe it would be more helpful to look at life in a different way than how we are used to.

Instead of associating the higher levels of dimensions with higher levels of morality, we see them in regards to more unification rather than fragmentation.

We see being able to perceive and operate within more dimensions of awareness equivalent to perceiving more. Instead of moralizing dimensions, we merely identify them for what they already are, more to perceive, more to be aware of.

And the fact is, some are not aware of other dimensions or the malleability of these dimensions while others are. Some believe linear time is objective rather than relative and so they do not understand those who talk about time as relative.

They don’t travel outside of their respective time zone, so they forget that it isn’t 4:00pm everywhere. Or they don’t understand how time works in relation to velocity.

To make matters worse, they apply this incorrect belief that time is objective to the Bible and to people's salvation.

So they were already missing the point when they failed to understand that time is relative, and now they make it worse for themselves by making faulty doctrines out of an incorrect notion.
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