Journal Discourse 78

January 7th 2023

David R Hawkins says from the place of God, nothing means anything. At it’s base reality, it just is. This is known as one who is and by the one who ‘is’ they are everywhere, everything, all at once. If you are all places at the same time, then there is no differentiation between you and something else.

Normally from a human perspective, we derive meaning from subjectivity. We say a cross walk is a cross walk because it isn’t a stop sign. We say a spoon is a spoon because it is not a fork. So from our perspective, we give meaning to that which is different to us and other things by calling it something else. That level of conceptualization allows us to accept differentiation in objects of matter.

But from the God level, everything everywhere all at once, it all: is. So THAT’S WHY when you tap into the space of no longer giving things meaning from the human level, but rather experiencing everything as yourself, as the Self, as one, you simultaneously tap into a state that allows you to be out of the matrix, in the matrix and everywhere beyond.

It’s the hallmark of enlightenment to be able to look beyond the temporary meaning of all energy vibrating at different frequencies which produces temporary form for us to “play in.” You, disguised in form, are able to go beyond form while simultaneously still being inside of it.

The ego to me is just the mind. Each person’s mind is like a computer capable of handling information based on many different considerations. Some people seem to be perceiving the world through a 1998 old Dell Computer with 2001 software while very few have spent years evolving their hardware to that of a 2023 super quantum computer. An outdated Dell computer’s ability to do what a quantum computer does such as having q bits be in two states simultaneously (super-positioned state) is literally impossible with that hardware. It literally is not possible.

Human evolution is in the mind, the hardware, the ego. The mind dictates the actions of the body and it also can dictate the experience of the consciousness within the body. So many within the spiritual community demonize and denigrate the mind/ego as if it’s this problem child that needs to die without realizing what a true gift it is for us.

The mind/ego allows us to perceive reality through our eyes. It gives us a subjective experience unique to our bodies. Without this mind/ego, there would be a melting pot of who did what without any form of temporary separation to explore within. Adyashanti said if someone tried to operate in this vessel with no ego (which would be impossible to be a human without a mind anyways), every time someone did something, they would think it was them because there would be no differentiation.


How would you put your clothes on if you’re completely non-local with no ego to ground you in the space-time dimension? If you’re brainless, you’re brainless. They call those people vegetables for a reason. They don’t interact, react, they just are. How do you experience a world of duality if you are that removed from “the game?” It could happen but it’s not ideal. The mind processor is specifically formulated to be able to interact, play with and explore our current simulation on Earth and beyond.

So in my opinion, the ego/mind gives us the human experience. It doesn’t need to completely “die” in order for one to experience enlightenment. And if there is a death, it would be short lived before the birth of a new ego because if you’re a human and you have a brain, you have an ego.

You may be confused and think, “Well if you equate the ego to the mind, wouldn’t that mean if the ego dies the brain would too?” And I would say let’s explore that. I don’t like how New Agers divorce the ego from the brain because it creates another block which requires new symbols, new definitions, and an unnecessarily long amount of explanations. Saying the ego is the mind is like saying we are part of God. If we die, it wouldn’t mean God dies. Our experience is temporary and we know that. The essence of I/God/Source is eternal. So similarly, if the ego (temporary) dies it doesn’t mean we end our human life with it. It’s like a discrete hardware (brain) and software (mind) upgrade that can happen without destroying your human vessel. The ego is a part of us as we are a part of God/I/ Source.

Let’s say for example, you recycle your old 2012 Microsoft computer for a 2019 Microsoft computer. Perhaps the ego is the part that connects our consciousness to our dream state and our wake state. The ego being part of the mind, but also a part of the mind in another place and time. So it’s death does not destroy the human vessel, although it may seem like it does. Think about it. Before you recycle your old computer, normally people upload all their data on an external drive or the cloud. The drive or cloud would represent the rest of your mind that is still active while the “old system dies off to make way for a new operating system to govern 95% of the vehicle’s activity.”


They say that 5% of our day is governed by our conscious while 95% is governed by our subconscious. So we don’t go brain dead because our brain still operates, and us as consciousness still exists beyond the body. But as many of the sages talk about the dark night of the soul, or the ego death, or dying before you die, it could be this process of evolving the ego. And how does an ego evolve? One might say death and rebirth, another might say switching out an old computer for a new computer and so forth.


Regardless, there’s a change in the brain that is measurable, definable and perceivable by the person inhabiting the brain, and possibly by others. They say that psychopaths literally lack a certain amount of brain material in the frontal lobe which contributes to their insane activity. If their “computer system” had that brain material that didn’t contribute to that insane activity, they would be much less likely to make an idiotic choice of murdering someone and ending up in prison for life over that murder.


For the first time in my life, I was introduced to meditation by my atheist college counselor, the man who singlehandedly changed my life. I promised him I would keep on it to help with my meditation and on the seventh day of meditating by myself, I remember writing in my journal that it felt like my brain was reconfiguring itself. It felt as if parts of my brain that would previously trigger health anxiety were diminishing, and the other parts that induced deep peace and joy, were becoming more active. I was shocked that I could pick up that change, but I did. Even though I couldn’t see inside my brain, I could still compare my new “computer” to the old one that I was living with before that moment.

This is why I firmly believe the ego/mind was meant for evolution and each stage of evolution is exciting, new, fresh, and allows us to explore reality from a new vantage point. When the mind changes, so does our experience. It’s like if you had blurry vision and your doctor gives you brand new eye glasses. That update to your “system” allows you to perceive reality in a more evolved way than before. Being able to see clearly is an evolutionary progression from having blurry vision. Similarly, our egos can go through transformations if we so allow for them to do so, but it starts with us.

If you are consciousness, that which exists beyond the mind/body complex, then evolution happens in the mind and reflects in the state of consciousness one perceives with. Consciousness is active awareness used in a way to interact and co-create. It is an aspect of I. I, is the part of everyone that does not need to evolve. Consciousness is part of the playground of experience but not trapped in form. So just like you can get a new computer (mind) and experience a simulated reality within the screen of a 1998 Dell computer, you can evolve your mind and experience a new way to perceive reality in our physical universe.

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January 9th


If Christians truly believe that the Creator is actually the one described in the Bible, then we would all be screwed, even Christians! Because according to the most accepted doctrine of the afterlife in Christianity, God does lose a majority of people to hell. God doesn’t get his desire for all men to be saved (Ephesians). A majority of people will burn forever for finite mistakes on earth. The world would be an actual purgatory and the end result is a death trap that leads to hell for most. It’s bleak, it’s sad, it’s sadistic and it doesn’t make sense in the slightest.

If the salvation doctrine twists from judaism to Christianity where a majority are doomed, how is that a benefit? How did it get worse when Christianity emerged??? Wasn’t it supposed to be better? In Judaism, a majority of Jews believe everyone will eventually be saved, it’s only a manner of time and their idea of “saved” is dependent on the person not on dogma.

Some Jews believe after many incarnations on earth everyone will be saved. Others believe after some soul cleansing in another realm. But most Jews have had an optimistic viewpoint of salvation for those who were not Jews that they would eventually be saved. How did salvation mutate and downgrade through Christianity?

I am way too optimistic about the Creator to devalue it to an angry, oppressive, colonizer, who fails to save and is pro-slavery, pro-patriarchal, pro treating women as property, to view that god as the God of all.

Me having this optimism has freed me from the pessimism attributed to God in the Christian Bible.

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When we create a highly sophisticated computer, we are essentially creating a new vessel for consciousness to explore itself in.

All form is an expression of life.

All form is energy vibrating at a particular frequency.

Creating a vessel opens the door for life to experience itself in a modality unique to its form.

When we create computers that can think similar to a human for themselves through their programmings, we are creating a vessel for consciousness similar to a human for them to explore life through.

Sentience is present in all life, but in relation to human sentience, we most definitely can create a vessel for consciousness to come within.

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It still shocks me, but I can actually feel the difference of when my brain is in beta, alpha and even theta waves. Theta is like your whole body is pulsating in subtle vibrations of love.

It’s a state of relaxation and of also complete connection to all that is. It goes beyond the boundary of form to that which is beyond it, hence why when we start to dream, our brain goes into theta and we “go beyond form” to the dream world and experience alternate realities.

I think experiencing nirvana is nothing more than someone who is able to induce peace naturally, regardless of their outward or inward circumstances. Not with alcohol, not with drugs, not with “doing it”, but simply by being present.

I’ve meant countless amounts of people who have tried to convince me to take recreational drugs for “enlightenment” but it gives off to me similar energy of someone trying to give another person a dollar when they already found an endless supply of money.

If only these people could feel and sustain the theta brain wave throughout the day where it has more precedence than the beta brain wave, they would realize peace was never something you need because you don’t have it, but rather an inherent reality of our essence because we are “it.”

—-

It still shocks me, but I can actually feel the difference of when my brain is in beta, alpha and even theta waves. Theta is like your whole body is pulsating in subtle vibrations of love.

It’s a state of relaxation but also complete connection to all that is. It goes beyond the boundary of the form to that which is beyond it, hence why when we start to dream, our brain goes into theta and we “go beyond form” to the dream world and experience alternate realities.

I think experiencing nirvana is nothing more than someone who has mastered their ability to induce peace naturally. Not with alcohol, not with drugs, not with “doing it”, but simply by being present.

I’ve meant countless amounts of people who have tried to convince me to take recreational drugs for “enlightenment” but it gives off similar energy of someone trying to give another person a dollar when they already found an endless supply of money.

If only these people could feel and sustain the theta brain wave throughout the day where it has more precedence than the beta brain wave, they would realize peace was never something you needed, it’s something we inherently are.

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January 11th 2023

based on my conjecture, one interprets the bible based on their level of consciousness.

For example, someone’s capacity to be able to read the bible in context, research historical accuracy, contextualize the information from a non-biased point of view, all contribute to a particular perspective that welcomes a higher level of understanding.

consciousness is my go to word for grouping together intellectual intelligence, emotional intelligence, research intelligence, and the capacity to remember what one reads to differentiate logical from illogical beliefs, doctrines, perspectives, etc.

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January 13th

dis-identification with positionalities reinstates the cessation of fear

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Similar to the phenomenon with mirror, neurons is what I do in meditation. I connect to other probable versions of myself similarly, so that I am able to inhabit in adopt that particular trait, ability, skill, and so forth. That’s what I consider someone who is multidimensional they not only exist in multiple dimensions, but they enter other dimensions, retrieve information, and then return to their own particular dimensions.

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January 14th

the intellect is like a computer. it is reprogrammable, upgradable, and extremely adept if one knows how to use it in a way that optimizes it’s full abilities.

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January 15th

When Christians say, “It’s their choice to accept or reject God into their heart”, that statement goes against the essence of Love.

If God as Love is truly omnipresent, omnipotent, omniscient, then God cannot help but be in everyone, everything, everywhere all at once.

There would be no place where God wouldn’t be, or else that would go against God’s inherent essence and nature as Love.

To reduce Love to a choice someone needs to make in order to receive it denies that God as Love is in everyone, everything, everywhere all at once.

It is not only in inherent denial of our essence being foundationally rooted and sourced in Love, it denies the Source itself, commonly and generically labeled as God.

See if God as love is the essence of everything, everywhere, all at once, then no one can help but be an extension of love. Regardless of if they express love into form or not, they are still love.

To reduce Love as an outward condition which one must receive is to reduce not only the Source, but also oneself.

To deny both the Source (God) and the Course (Humanity) is to adopt a stream of thought that is painful, suffering-inducing, harmful, and hopeless.

It causes one to assume that a majority of people will die without God’s love.

It causes one to assume that a majority will suffer in eternal damnation because of their failure to choose Love.

It causes one to become desperate to spread their religion to the point of fanaticism, loyalism and extremism.

It promotes the idea “The end justifies the means” by promoting harmful colonization, mass genocide against those who do not convert, and stripping others of their beliefs interlaced with generations of culture and tradition so that they will adopt this new belief system to “become saved.”

To the extent that one becomes extreme due to the denial of Love being in everyone, everything, everywhere, all at once, is the extent to which they will harm others like cancer harms the body.

Punishment for those who disobey the religion become justified, even if they themselves do not follow the religion, and a new belief system that “Love is a choice one must choose” is all due to the extreme denial of Love.

The way out of this insanity is by remembering that Love is everything, everywhere, all at once. Love is the essence of all and love cannot be reduced to a choice because a choice is based on a lack mindset. It creates the mirage that one doesn’t have it, which is part of the illusion that Love is limited and not in everyone, everything, everywhere, all at once.

The question is, do you accept that God as Love is in everyone, everything, everywhere, all at once (Omniscient, Omnipotent, Omnipresent)? Or do you deny it? How is your life experienced based on your belief?

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If someone believes that God, the I, is in everyone, everything, everywhere all at once, but then they treat it like an entity... They treat it like a concept... They treat it as if it is a projection of another gendered human, where it's emotions, experiences, wants and dreams mimic humans... Then in essence, they are essentially standing up for God's limitations rather than God's limitlessness.

If someone treats God like an entity, then do they really worship the Creator of the universe, or do they worship the creation of their own concept? Or do they worship an existing entity of lesser degree who has tricked them into believing he is the Creator of the Universe, the Source of all?

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The more one memorizes, the more one create patterns. What makes someone a master at their craft is how solidified the patterns of their craft are within their brains. The more solidified these patterns are, the less they will need to work it out and find out how to do it on the spot in the moment, and the the more they will be able to translate what was already in their brain into the physical world because they already worked it out hundreds of thousands of times before.

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