Entry 821 - Entry 840

Entry 821 - July 25th 2021

Since space and time are relative, that means we live in a relative (subjective) world.


Entry 822

No one told me how lonely it would be
Making the change to transition fully.


Entry 823

Strange rebuttals to my gender identity that people have said to me:

“In one year, you’re going to de-transition.”

I find it humorous that they think they know me more than I know myself. It isn’t a matter of choosing which gender identity I like better; it’s that my gender identity in this incarnation has always felt male, even though I was assigned female at birth.

I’m not androgynous, where sometimes I feel one way or another. I’ve simply felt that I should have a male body for this particular incarnation.

“This age is making it a fad to transition.”

I literally only know two personal friends who are transitioning out of thousands of friends and family. Plus, that statement is not statistically accurate at all. Transgender people only make up about 0.6% of the population. Just because the internet makes the world seem smaller does not mean the stats randomly change to cater to your unrealistic biases.


Entry 824 - July 31st

He thinks it’s just a phase,
That I’ll grow out of it like I grew out of childish maze.
He says he predicts the end of my transitioning,
For a man who doesn’t believe in psychics, that's pretty alarming.
In one life or another, he’ll learn to let people be who they truly are
By finding out who he really is.
But until then, he’ll continue to project who he thinks I am,
And I'll continue to live my life authentically as I am.


Entry 825

Each day, I try to actively let go,
To not put attention on the energy and flow
That for some reason exists strongly between us,
As if we are from the same planet like Venus.
But then I feel you call my energy in the night,
And realize I’m once again right by your side,
Both in the dream state, but it’s clear this is more than a meaningless thing of fate.


Entry 826 - August 3rd 2021

The whole, "This will lower your frequency," or "This will raise your frequency," is, in my opinion, bullshit. The observer and the observed are the same. You can already create expansion through anything. Anything can raise your frequency, and anything can lower it, but its effect on you is for you to decide. It’s not the thing that has the ability or power to do so; it’s you. You are the one creating the ability or lack thereof.


Entry 827

What I’m doing is not simply dabbling in belief systems. Rather, I'm in the realm of the innocent and insatiably curious desire to create through experience and delete unnecessary trauma from my psyche.


Entry 828

David Hawkins' work has a lot of similarities to the major religions, and it is easily becoming that. If I could describe his beliefs, they remind me foundationally of the Eastern religions with a spicy pinch of Christianity dropped on top.

Here they have their fancy-dancy little statistics of how much they think the world’s current vibration is based on their body confirmation tests.

However, if there are an infinite amount of parallel universes, yes, that very well could be one of the parallel universe's vibratory patterns of the masses, but not every single parallel universe is subject to such a low reading that he believes is the true vibratory pattern for the Earth.

There’s also a parallel universe where Trump is still president. Where we are in yet another war, the list goes on and on. So this “final truth on the matter” is bullshit, in my opinion.


Entry 829 - August 4th

Similar to how, as a college student, you wouldn’t find yourself reading third-grade-level books because it isn’t challenging, it isn’t your current level, and it is meant for third graders—so in essence, just like how our reading levels progress, our perception levels progress as well.

Someone may read something, and to them, it is true, it is fact, and it is real. They subject themselves to the reality of that “reading level” or “perception level” and won’t see more unless they are willing to challenge themselves to see more. They can stay at the “third-grade reading level” if they want as adults, but it can be even more exciting to read things that challenge our views, beliefs, and ideas of the world, exponentially increasing our “reading level” or “perception level” of the world and all that is.

The thing is, who is willing to strip themselves naked of limiting beliefs to be observed? Who is willing to look at their belief systems that they identify with in a non-defensive way? Who is really willing to have everything removed from themselves to find out who they truly are? What happens when one comes to the end of one belief system after another? Perhaps they can find a place beyond belief systems—beyond the idea of a conceptual scope of beliefs that are taken as true. Can truth exist without beliefs? Are beliefs what separate us more than they unite us? And if they do, is perhaps the way to realize we are all truly one—as Jesus prayed we would realize before he went to the cross—to drop our beliefs? And if so, how can we truly become free from any limiting beliefs?

If perception is to awareness as beliefs are to concepts, then perhaps we were always meant to transcend the other. The focal point is remembering you are beyond the limited nature of the other, and that which is limited is not truly something that exists. Anything that has a beginning and an ending never had an eternal foundation to sustain its eternal existence. So why do we try so hard to fit our infinite nature into a temporary belief system that causes more harm than help?


Entry 830

I asked a friend who is a faithful follower of Christianity if they were afraid of tapping into their power, and they answered yes…

Many religions are designed to use fear to keep you dependent on them rather than realizing you don’t need them. Once you realize you don't need religion to thrive, that is where the real fun begins.

Not all Christians are religious, but Christianity is a religion. Just as people made religion, people can make Christianity mean whatever they want it to mean to them personally, but in form, Christianity is still an organized religion and falls under that category by definition.

If you're not religious, then don't follow a religion. Just follow Jesus. If you're truly not religious, stop reading the Bible and read what Jesus has placed on your heart. Yes, I know Noah's story is great, but your story with God is even better and more applicable for you. Balance is key. Learn from others, but also learn from your own life. In my opinion, there's no need to serve religion unless you want to experience that in this life.


Entry 831

Most religions are sharing limiting thoughts of God together with a community.

It’s like they flaunt this idea: "Oh, you don’t limit God how WE limit God??? You’re not REAL followers of Jesus."

"Oh, you don’t limit God to only being our Father? Then you aren’t a REAL CHRISTIAN."

"Oh, you don’t limit God by seeing Him as only in the male gender? Oh, then you’re not a REAL CHRISTIAN."

It’s hilarious.


Entry 832

How I see things might not be beneficial for you. How you see things might not be beneficial for me. It’s not because one is right or the other one is wrong, but rather, both are valid experiences of a certain type of perception. Maybe one might be more expansive than the other, but an experience of an expansive perception versus a constricted perception is still an experience. Neither one is better than the other—they’re merely experiences meant to be explored by consciousness itself, us.


Entry 833 - August 16th 2021

The reason why I think masturbation is important to do before entering a relationship sexually is that, first, you find out what you like and what you don’t like. Secondly, you learn that there’s a difference between doing something to get gratifying pleasure and doing it to connect to the Divine.

One is easy and a quick rush; the other is more challenging and a way into a deeper experience. Also, through the latter, you are much more conscientious of the two when entering a relationship. Then you desire to never exploit your partner’s body for pleasure, but rather treat it genuinely as a holy portal to the Divine that you both enter into mutually. The latter goes beyond temporary pleasure and allows the two to meet in the infinite power joined together in a holy act of union. So if you don’t know the difference, then many times, you could exploit your partner for pleasure.


Entry 834 - August 6th

We need to move out of the realm of distrust in the government versus trusting the government and move into the realm of trusting ourselves. If you realize you create your reality by your thoughts and energy, by your attention, then you choose what probable universe you will be in. It doesn’t matter what’s happening outside because what’s happening outside is oftentimes a reflection of what is happening within you.

You choose from an infinite number of probabilities, and what you attract to yourself will be because the observer and the observed are the same. So stop blaming other people for everything that goes wrong in your life and take responsibility. If you want to try changing something outside of you, start by changing yourself.


Entry 835

In order for there truly to be an infinite number of probabilities, then there can never truly be a closed system. Technically, everything at some level is open in one way or another, regardless of whether we can see it with our physical senses or not.


Entry 836

The issue with the 17 levels of consciousness from David Hawkins' books is that it judges emotions by a certain number. It’s analyzing discreetly certain emotions and then saying it’s non-local, but it’s still judging them based on a numerical system. We know life is not discreetly numerical. We know there are more than closed systems, so it’s not true to reality. It’s true to maybe a dualistic potential reality—maybe to one probable universe—but it’s not infinitely real to all.


Entry 837

At first, we only knew about classical physics and thought everything behaved within the laws of classical physics.

Classical physics is deterministic. We can measure the behavior. It is like binary: either 0 or 1. C-bits are considered classical.

However, our whole world got turned upside down when quantum physics was discovered. We realized particles can not only be 0 or 1; they can be 0 and 1 simultaneously.

Light can be a particle or a wave, as well as a particle AND a wave at the same time.

Quantum physics deals with the smallest particles called quanta, or qbits. If everything is made of quanta particles, then in some way, everything should behave similarly to these quanta particles.

Think about religions. Many religions operate similar to classical physics. They think there are only certain laws. There is only one correct way to believe in God or read scriptures about God. They operate on the level of duality, which consists of some sort of exclusion and discreteness: "This is correct, and that is not correct. 1 is right, and 0 is wrong." They see things as not being simultaneously correct.

But you see... there is a level of reality BEYOND duality, 0's or 1's, and cause and effect. If you go within, you will eventually find the part of you that goes beyond duality.


Entry 838

Light is an open system.

A particle is considered to be a closed system.

But we know that light can be a wave and a particle at the same time, so that means that in the grand scheme of things, everything is, in some way, an open system.

Similar to how quantum physics says quanta can be a particle AND a wave at the same time, a closed system AND an open system can coexist in some way. I would label both as consciousness.

Think of it as layers of abstraction. We are looking up from one more layer above particle and wave to the idea that encapsulates huge masses to small masses. We are looking at the idea of a system. As above, so below.


Entry 839

Quantum physicists are dumbfounded by quantum entanglement—how measuring one electron can affect another electron, no matter the distance. Some even purport that there is no way for them to communicate with each other. I would say the missing puzzle piece to this strange phenomenon is consciousness, which goes undetected because it goes beyond wave or particle.

I believe consciousness can exist in a state before a wave or particle, as a wave or a particle, or as a wave and a particle.

The connection between the two is consciousness.

To answer how quantum entanglement happens, Rob Bell said something needs to travel faster than the speed of light, which Einstein thought was impossible.

However, let’s say hypothetically that consciousness travels faster than the speed of light. That would explain the connection.

"Spooky action at a distance" actually happens contrary to Einstein’s deterministic viewpoint of the gloves where it is already determined before one views it.

If you think about this—"As above, so below." If one electron can affect another one regardless of the distance, then if there is still a connection, perhaps called consciousness or something else that can be proven, then that would mean your simultaneous selves can all be affected simultaneously in some way.

There are some physicists who believe that once a probability is chosen, the other ones are deleted or go away… but then, to where?

Then there are other physicists (such as myself) who believe each of the possible outcomes does exist because infinite potential is behind each probability for infinity. It is natural to allow things to create and expand rather than constrict and disintegrate for eternity.


Entry 840

Being aware of more altered states of consciousness means that more can pop into your field.



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