Exploring Life

Entry 1,585 I remember being in the Loomis house and thinking how the more I became self-realized, felt heaven within, or experienced nirvana, the more I felt possessed. Now I realize that perception was still from being identified with the ego. I still assumed I was the ego and that the higher aspect of me was not myself. I still had not deprogrammed from fundamental Christian doctrines around living authentically. Also, this was coupled with my ego's desperate attempt to remain in control and not be subject to the higher aspect of myself. Entry 1,586 - December 30th To something outside of you, the realization that one can experience enlightenment through oneself transcends the use of substances, such as drugs, to trigger a pseudo-awakening. Entry 1,587 What one considers intelligent is based on one’s particular consciousness. Even someone below average intelligence could consider people above them as stupid. Even people with higher intelligence could perceive the people below th...

Entry 1,565 - December 12th 2022 I think it’s important to remember to consider the audience Jesus was talking to. At the time, many of the Pharisees were using exclusion as a means by which they believed they could make it back to God while still hating Jesus. Therefore, Jesus used the idea of their exclusion as a means to show that they could not make it back to the Father without him. Jesus drilled this point in by saying, "I am the way, the truth, and the life, and no one makes it back to the Father without me." Jesus' words were not meant to be a new doctrine of exclusivity resting only on him as the means by which Pharisees would be saved. It was meant to highlight something much deeper than the doctrine of exclusivity held by the Pharisees, who thought they could have deep hatred for Jesus and still make it back to God. It was to prove a point based on how they hated Jesus and still thought they were fine without him. Jesus was radically inclusive, not leaving anyo...

Entry 1,538 - November 26th, 2022 How you perceive things changes things. Do you think Jesus would understand Christianity as a Jew? This question could shed light on how religion has changed throughout the centuries and how Jesus would most likely not understand Christianity—especially because he was a Jew, not a Christian. Entry 1,539 I’ve already “found” nirvana. Spoiler: it's Me, teehee. All That Is Me is my Nirvana. I never was cut off from it. I simply had to remember it. My new goal is to see how much of my soul power I can handle in this body. Entry 1,540 - November 27th, 2022 So Yogananda has said, “Your environment is stronger than your will,” which to me is definitely not true—maybe to him, though. From my perspective, we create our own reality. The internal environment is often a reflection of our outer environment—either of what is healed or what needs to be healed. It can be more than that too, but oftentimes it boils down to that. So if he perceives his outer environ...

Entry 1,520 - November 20th, 2022 Many historians believe the reason why there are no records of Hebrews being enslaved by Egyptians is because Hebrews were originally Egyptians. Entry 1,521 I’m publicly out as a transgender man for many reasons, but one of the bigger reasons is to show everyone that you can change throughout your life and still be okay. Some people accept change slower than others. Take, for example, when some from the Republican Party refused to accept that Trump lost the election against Biden. Then, there are others who can move at an extraordinarily fast rate, leaving people struggling to keep up with their pace of change. Think of teachers trying to find ways to challenge the kids who are bored in math class because they already mastered the material a year ago. Change is an inherent part of our human experience that happens both within and around every human being. Knowing that everyone changes, it begs the question: why do some accept their personal change as v...

Entry 1,510 - November 12th 2022 Death has become my best friend. Entry 1,511 The way that those on the right-hand path view those on the left-hand path is obviously skewed in favor of those on the right-hand path, or the path of deflection (right-hand), rather than attraction (left-hand). The right-hand path's whole claim to fame is rising above matter to Nirvana, rather than playing with and using matter while experiencing Nirvana. The problem with the right-hand path of repelling matter is that we literally came to play in the world of matter. So a rejection of play is a serious issue regarding their goal of Nirvana. Plus, let's be honest—what's attractive about a self-proclaimed nirvanic religion that tells you that you must "resist your attraction to matter"?  Many who exclusively subscribe to the right-hand path say that, after a certain amount of time evolving along the left-hand path, people will eventually need to “turn around” and polarize toward the pri...