Entry 1-1.7
Entry 1
Dear Long Lost Friend,
It's been a while since we hung out, even talked, but I hope you're doing well. It wasn't a coincidence that you came into my life, and I believe it wasn't a coincidence that you left either. Sometimes we cross paths, and sometimes we uncross. Sometimes people grow apart. Sometimes people just fall away.
Some might call it destiny, I call it life. We had some really good times and some even better laughs. We made the most out of our hard days and still managed to work through the hard times together. I enjoyed inviting you to see other events in my life and I also enjoyed seeing more of your life.
Then little by little the moments became less, the talks less frequent. We no longer had any classes together or saw each other as much. Naturally we both got busier and busier and we had to realign our schedules in new directions. Eventually our paths no longer crossed. Even as much as we tried to make an effort, they became lost as even our thoughts were directed in different directions. We not only lost thought about hanging out, we no longer crossed in each other's minds on a daily basis.
Fast forward a couple of years. As the busy year went by, we continue to do life, a memory from an object or a song reminds me of shared those fun memories I shared with you, and I reminisce on the good times. I think, what if I reached out to that person again. Maybe we could pick up like no time left but then another part of me accepts that we're on different trajectories, different roads and maybe that's okay. Maybe it's okay that everything is not how it used to be. Maybe it's okay that they're living life separately from you.
Maybe it's okay and you can just accept that. Then I smile at the fond memory and continue forward with my busy day. I just wanted to say I haven't completely forgotten you. I don't believe I ever will. When you do randomly pop in my head because of a moment we shared, I smile because regardless of how long ago it was, those were great times. I pray you are thriving and living your best life and then when the memory passes out of my mind, I go on with life. May you be as happy as you made me all the days of your life.
With Love,
An Old Friend
Entry 1.5 - Exploring Orthodoxy
To be honest, before my boyfriend brought up Orthodoxy I didn't really know what it was, nor did I care what it was and therefore never researched to understand more about it. For all I know my Greek Yiayia (Grandma) and her family were Greek Orthodox until her mother decided to leave and attend a Foursquare church (she was 12 years old at the time). Then eventually she received an honorary pastor recognition at the Foursquare church she continued to attend.
Growing up, my Yiayia was your typical Greek Yiayia. She lived in a room downstairs, she spoke Greek, she sang beautiful songs downstairs, and she really knew how to eat... A lot. And she really liked her white wine! Not only that, but she was the funniest Yiayia I ever knew. When the whole vine stuff happened she stole the show on my vine multiple times and by the time of her death, many reached out in the comments sharing how much she meant to them, and that was beautiful. She lived a long, healthy life with the Lord and is goals to the max. I could tell she really loved me by the way she would shuffle over to her Buick, hop in the car and stalk me outside as I was playing with my friends until I got back in the house because it was dark. She's also who I practiced all my cringe jokes on before I took them out into the real world. Not only that, but she was one of the first people who encouraged me to be free with my humor. She always told me I reminded her of her cousin Janet who was a movie star and I didn't know who Janet was, but I always felt like we would've been good friends. Overall, she was Yiayia goals and I would've given anything to spend a few more years with her. If only she met my 6 foot 5 inch boyfriend, she'd nearly have a heart attack from shock. She loves blondes and loves squeezing muscle just as much as I do, so it would've been a great time. And yeah, if I only had a little more time I would've asked her more stories about Greece, about her life, about her journey with Christ, but what's done is done, and now I can only speculate.
So my interest in Orthodoxy came with these curious questions: What was my Yiayia a part of? How did it impact her life? Was the church part of their culture? What even did they do in there?
So Peter asked me if I wanted to check out Vespers with him, which is just another name for the Greek Orthodox churches prayer service. When I got there, I was so fascinated by the reverence they hold and how they treat each other and come before God. These people stood almost the whole entire service (2 hours) and at the very end we were all on our hands and knees bowed before our Creator. It was a service full of healing. I admired the love I could witness between the members and how tight-knit this group was. This was a church with maybe 15–30 people who attend, so it was pretty small from what I'm used to experiencing (mega-church culture). I appreciated their ancient liturgy, which they testify that it stems back to the oldest church service we know of. I appreciate the choir, the incense, being surrounded by beautiful portraits of the saints who've gone before us. It reminded me that we stand on the shoulders of those who've gone before us, and we're fighting the good fight just like they did. I appreciated how Biblically centered their prayers were. There wasn't anything strange that made me feel uncomfortable and question where it came from (like some past churches I've gone to). And what was cool was that most of the Orthodox prayers were literally straight from Psalms and other parts of the Bible, so that put my mind at ease. I'm not one to normally get emotional in services, but it did manage to make me get emotional. I really felt God's presence while worshiping and praying with the others. If a church can make you aware of God's presence, then hat's off to that church.
Anyway, it was cool to explore this church with Peter, and I feel like I'm learning about my roots. Even though my great-great grandma decided to leave, and my mother never went and my Yiayia left at an early age, I can't help but appreciate these Christians and their expression of faith. The more I learn about history, the more I'm shocked about how the Orthodox Christian's had to suffer such brutality from the ottoman Turks, and the Catholic Church. The crusades by the Catholic Church declared by the Pope were not only for the Muslims, but also for the Orthodox. The Catholics sacked Constantinople and brutality killed innocent Orthodox Christians in the name of God by the Pope's orders. The Orthodox didn't fight with hatred and wars and bloodshed, they endured as martyrs, and that can be seen in history over and over again. So I encourage you to read this history of Christianity. It's remarkable and if you're a Christian and you attend church, it's part of your history too and you should know it.
So where does that put me now? Well, I am learning. I personally don't ever want to stop learning. I don't want to just read about something, I love to understand from their perspective. Maybe that's partly because I'm an actress and that's how I prepare myself for the characters I play, but I feel like it also helps save me from ignorance. I'm learning about the church history, I'm challenging myself to grow, and I appreciate the journey of growth I'm experiencing as I continue to learn from so many different Christians. I appreciate my heritage. I appreciate my Yiayias church and I hope I can learn from them as I've learned from so many other churches.
I still attend College Avenue Baptist weekly, and I don't plan on changing that. That's my community, that's my family, that's my home. That's where God has me, and I don't feel called to leave it behind. But that doesn't stop the fact that I'm still on a journey of learning, realizing that I don't know everything there is to know about how to worship, how to pray, etc. and so that's why I'm open to learning and not closed off.
We all have something to offer, to help, to learn from, and I'd be ignorant to think I didn't need to explore more. Being content with only what you know doesn't seem like a very fulfilling life to me. I want to be challenged. I want to be questioned. I want to consider with others and not be afraid to have my concepts broken down. I want to see life through other people's perspectives and take the good and leave the bad. I want to keep this child like mentality until God calls me home. Life is so much more interesting when we challenge all we know instead of accepting it blindly. To be free to educate and understand from different viewpoints is liberating and in my personal opinion, frees us from personal bias, racism and sexism.
I believe it's essential for all human beings to work on developing empathy for others, and a very important way of accomplishing that is by exploring a life that is lived differently than yours.
Entry 1.7 - Why I believe we should fully switch to self driving cars
Here’s the reality: not everyone has the same level of education. There are countless people who drive while high, drunk, or consumed with suicidal thoughts. People are unpredictable, and that’s what makes driving so dangerous. If someone wakes up one day and decides to use their car to kill themselves and take someone else with them, nothing is stopping them. The potential for that to happen every day makes driving inherently risky.
Personally, I’d rather share the road with cars programmed and checked—not once, not twice, but daily—by a team of software engineers than worry if one day Becky’s going to wake up hating life, get drunk at the bar, and kill not only herself but also a family of four with a newborn baby. That’s messed up. Becky might be going through a lot, and I can’t imagine all her struggles. As an adult, she’s expected to make the right choices, but we shouldn’t have to leave our safety to that probability every day when there are safer options.
Accidents caused by stupidity would be virtually nonexistent if we eliminated human error, lack of education, or unstable individuals who want to hurt others, commit suicide, or drive under the influence. Obviously, it won’t be perfect, but what is perfect in our society? However, I would argue that self-driving cars would substantially reduce the number of car accidents that result in death.
It baffles me that people are so afraid of self-driving cars, yet they trust strangers on the road. Honestly, this is why I believe more people need to be educated in computer science to understand how beneficial technology can be in saving lives instead of fearing it.
Knowledge is what sets people free from ignorance, and without it, we have individuals who still believe the Earth is flat. Absence of knowledge is slavery to the conspiracies of the world. Give me a car programmed by software engineers over unpredictable drivers any day. May we all strive to educate ourselves before believing opinions that lack well-supported arguments.
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